Relief

On Monday I had a pre-examination before the operation to remove the gallbladder and I had a bad cold. I had read almost everything I came over about the operation, so I knew that if I had a cold they would postpone the operation. There was no way in hell I could deal with that. I had called the hospital to get my operation prioritized, and I got the operation date on the phone – 30th November. At first I was whopping happy because I finally had a date. Then it hit me – it was 20 nights before the operation. The gallstone attacks always comes at nighttime, so I started counting the nights – not days. That meant I would have 10 attacks before the operation. 10 nights of no sleep and hell. I called my doctor the next day and got a new painkiller prescription.

Normally I would have done everything I could to hide my cold, but I couldn’t hide that I had lost my voice. I sounded like a pubertal boy whenever I didn’t whisper, so it didn’t take long before the nurse asked “Do you have a cold?” Lying wouldn’t have gotten me anywhere, my voice would betray me.

She said that they didn’t operate when the patient had a cold. It was too dangerous. I started crying and said that I had to have that operation. The gallstones were affecting everything. I have slept between 2 – 4 hours a night for three months now and I am toast. I am taking care of a baby and I am exhausted. I am only eating one meal a day, and I was unable to take care of myself. To even manage to get one meal into myself was difficult.

She brought in the anesthesiologist to look at me. She listened to my lungs and said that I had a bad cold and wouldn’t operate as I was now. They were afraid that during anesthesia I would stop breathing, especially if I was coughing. I continued crying stating that I had to have this operation. Then she said that it wasn’t Wednesday yet (the day of the operation) and I could go home and do everything to get better. She wanted to at least give me a little glimmer of hope. I took it.

They wrote down something in their papers about me having a cold. I went out of that appointment and ready to drink a lot of warm water and google everything I could about getting rid of this cold. Tuesday came and I was even worse. My coughing was running rampant, and I got a tip from a former coworker of mine (Thanks Cirstyn!) about Noskapin that is great for dry coughing. I got my boyfrind to buy it and it helped, but my mood was getting really low. There was no chance in hell I would get this operation. I tried calling the hospital to let them know that there was no point in coming in for the operation, but nobody answered the phone.

I continued drinking a lot of warm water, taking noskapin and when the morning of the operation day came I noticed that I was very good. I wasn’t coughing! My nose had no mucus. I was so happy, except that I still had no voice. I still sounded like a pubertal boy when speaking, and preferred to whisper.

I walked to the hospital taking deep breaths in the hopes that it would clear my lungs so much that they would operate me. I didn’t talk so that my voice might hold a little bit. When I came to the hospital my days of small coughing was over, and I would only clear my nose very carefully, I didn’t want any nurses to notice it. A nurse finally asked for me and pointed me to a bed and gave me hospital clothes to wear. I nodded a lot to what she said, and tried to speak as little as possible.

I saw she was holding the paper where it stated I had a cold. I got the clothes on me, and a lot was happening. She was asking me many questions and I tried to answer with my best voice. If I needed to cough I did it while there was nobody around, and as subdued as possible. The minutes passed and I was waiting for the doctor to come and check on my cold, stating that they wouldn’t operate. The nurse put something on my hand and attached dripping liquid into it since I hadn’t been allowed to drink for two hours. They still didn’t ask about my cold. It took 45 minutes of making me ready, and I was just waiting for the ax to drop. When the nurse told me to get up and walk to the operation room I knew I had made it. They never asked about my cold. A doctor didn’t come to check up on it.

I don’t know if it was because I wasn’t coughing while I was there, or that it didn’t really matter that much. I never asked because I didn’t want to ruin it. The operation took one hour. I didn’t have any sense of time of the operation or anything. The only reason I know is because I read my papers before I left. They were just lying next to my bed, and I was curious. Everything went fine and when I got out of it, I got a small plastic box with my gallstones in it. Three of them and they had the size of large peas. They were big! That was my first reaction. No wonder I had a lot of pain when they tried to get out. One of the gallstones has the size of almost 1 cm. That’s a lot! I can’t believe I had those in my body.

 Before I left I talked to a woman next to me. I knew she had removed her gallbladder as well, so I just had to see how her gallstones looked like.

She only had one stone, but it was a little bigger than mine. When I say a little bigger, then that is actually a lot considering they try to go out of the body.

After the operation I was so relieved. Finally I might get some sleep again. I don’t have to worry about what I eat anymore. I can drink coffee and cola now.

On the day of the operation I even drank mocca with fatty milk and chocolate, but I got a bit sick quickly. hehe, obviously it was a little early to test the water on the operation day, silly me 🙂

But it was fine. I had almost drank up the mocca and the unwellness subsided quickly afterwards and I drank a little water. Problem fixed.

As for pain, I didn’t have much of it. When I came out of the operating room I felt a lot of pain, and they dozed me up pretty good until they didn’t want to give me any more before some time had passed. Even then the pain was worth it, I was so happy. The pain after the operation was a lot less than the gallstone attacks. Afterwards I was happy and drugged, and I was in good shape. I got home, and was still in good shape. I got a lot of painkillers to take with me home. Now on the day after the operation, I don’t need the pain killers. I feel that something has been done on my stomach and I don’t have the same movement as before. I’m tired and want to stay in bed, but I’m fine. Whenever I eat I get stomach pains and have to run to the toilet many times. It takes time for the stomach to stomach the new situation, I guess.

I’m so happy that this is finally over. It’s over. I can’t express how much that matters to me.

I can’t believe I waited so long before I had it done (2 years). I’m not going to be that stupid again.

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Yet again…

I have another gallstone attack. They come about every second day now. Anybody will say that you get little sleep when having a baby. Try having a baby, gallstone attacks every second day and on top of that – sleep issues. Sometimes I wonder how little sleep is required before hallucinations come.

I like the painkillers I get for the gallstone a little too much now. When I take them, it takes about an hour before the effect fully sets in, but then suddenly my loss of sleep that night is the plan of the universe and everything is just as it’s supposed to be. I like being drugged and not feeling any pain. Or hunger.

Just five nights left until the operation.

Then I can drink coffee again. And cola.

I wonder if that was the plan of the universe?

Posted in English, My life | 5 Comments

Breakthrough!

Photo by: http://www.flickr.com/photos/rschreff/ License: CC BY-NC-SA 2.0

This week I had a breakthrough! I have been able to go out with Simon to different appointments, and it have worked out fine. I’m able to get out and do stuff ! I have now come to the level where I’m able to take good care of Simon AND myself to the point where I’m very happy now. I have met other mothers with babies and get to socialize, and that has felt really good. It also showed me that Simon is still crying more and are more grumpy than other babies (mine is always the one who cries while the others are quiet), but it’s within manageable levels where I can take care of myself at the same time. I’m happy again!

The first two months I was miserable, then for a couple of weeks I was in equlibrium and now I’m back to being happy when Simon is 10 weeks old. Joyously happy 🙂 It has become so much easier to enjoy this time with Simon, and I’m beginning to understand now what it means to enjoy the time when they are infants. He is the most beautiful baby I have ever seen (of course) and when he smiles and make those little laughing sounds, it really smelts the heart.

I have become one of the baby carriage mafia now.  So watch out – Helene and Simon is in da town.

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Today is a good day

Photo by: http://www.flickr.com/photos/fourtwenty/ License: CC BY-NC-SA 2.0

Today is a good day. I got four hours of consecutive sleep, apparently I can function on four hours. When I only get between 2 – 3 hours of consecutive sleep I usually function badly for the rest of the day. It’s like the brain just goes to halt. I would like to say sleep instead of halt, but sadly when I get too little sleep my brain is wide awake, there’s just no activity up there. That’s when Dr. Phil suddenly becomes a treat to watch and I get disappointed when I’ve seen the episode before. I can just forget about reading a book. I stare at the letters, but they don’t register. To move the eyes becomes a tiresome exercise.  If I manage to get Simon to sleep, I’m completely unable to go to sleep myself. It’s frustrating, but I don’t know what I can do about it. I used to think that I could sleep when the baby slept, but I don’t work that way. I don’t have a sleep function that I can activate when (badly) needed.

But today is a good day. I got up and after feeding Simon I even got to shower – unsupervised by the little terrorist himself. Afterwards I ate breakfast, and the clock wasn’t even 10am. Breakfast time has usually been from 12pm to 2pm, but not today. What used to be natural activities I didn’t think about  is now luxury. But not today.

Today is a good day.

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Sykehus-skrekk

Photo by http://www.flickr.com/photos/waelder11/ License: CC BY-NC-SA 2.0

Jeg var vel rundt fem år gammel da jeg ble påkjørt. Jeg lekte med noen unger, og skulle krysse gata. Jeg så en bil komme, men han var jo så langt unna. Jeg hadde ikke noe forståelse for fart på den tiden, jeg var jo bare fem. Sjåføren måtte rygge for å hente frem støvelen min som lå under hjulet. Jeg ble påkjørt rett ved der vi bodde, så mamma kom løpende ut når hun hørte hylskriket mitt.

Det neste jeg husker er at jeg var i senga mi. Mamma og legen sto i dørkarmen, jeg lot ikke legen få komme lenger. Det kunne ikke ha vært så alvorlig, for jeg var livredd for legen og klamret meg helt inntil sengehjørnet på andre siden av rommet. “Hun er fin” husker jeg legen sa, eller ihvertfall noe som hadde samme betydning. Jeg var bare lettet over at legen dro.

Den legeskrekken har blitt værende med meg. Da jeg var i tyve-årene, så ønsket jeg å utfordre skrekken min ved å bli blodgiver. Det hjalp ikke. Når jeg ble gravid, så kom skrekken frem i full vigør, og den roet seg ikke ned før jeg hadde absorbert all kunnskap om fødsler som det var mulig og mere tid hadde gått. Jeg hadde bestemt meg for hvordan fødselen min skulle gå. Jeg skulle komme inn til sykehuset, og ungen skulle bare gli ut uten at noen trengte å ta på meg en gang.

Jeg var livredd for alt av inngrep – tang, vakuum og keisersnitt. Hadde de snakket om tang eller vakuum ville jeg ha nektet. Jeg hadde allerede gitt klar beskjed før fødselen, og i fødebrevet mitt til jordmødrene at om det var snakk om keisersnitt så ville jeg ha narkose. Med keisersnitt skjærer de jo i deg, det er helt forferdelig. Med narkose så er man i det minste fullstendig vekke, og da har det egentlig ingen betydning hva de gjør med kroppen min.

Fødselen min endte med keisersnitt – uten narkose. Når de begynte å snakke om keisersnitt, så nektet jeg vilt hvis ikke jeg fikk narkose. Ikke faen om jeg skulle ha keisersnitt. Jeg skjønte ikke engang at jeg skulle ta keisersnitt før de begynte å kjøre senga mi mot operasjonssalen. Jeg vet de prøvde å gi meg hva de syntes var gode argumenter for keisersnitt. En av de gikk vel i den her tralten “Men tenk på hvor koselig det blir når du får se ungen din”. Hvor på mine svar som oftest gikk i forskjellige varianter av “Det gir jeg fullstendig faen i !”. Men når fagfolkene hadde tatt valget, så kjørte de bare på uten å ta noen hensyn. Jeg merket ikke en gang at riene hadde sluttet å komme før jeg lå i operasjonssalen. Etterpå fikk jeg høre at jeg hadde kjeftet kirurgen huden full, men selv husker jeg lite av det. Det er det som er det fine med hukommelsen min. Jeg har en tendens til å glemme vonde ting, det er bare enkelte øyeblikk som jeg husker godt men alt imellom er borte.

Under fødselen hadde jeg en jordmor student hos meg hele tiden, flott jente. Hun besøkte meg og Simon etterpå når vi lå på barselsavdelingen. “Følte du at at keisersnittet var et overtramp” spurte hun meg forsiktig. “Det er over”, svarte jeg. “Jeg har det bra nå”. Jeg ser ingen grunn til å gråte over spilt melk. Det var over, og jeg hadde det bra nå. Keisersnittet var i fortiden, og det var ingen vits å tenke mer over det. Jeg skjønte hvorfor de gjorde som de gjorde, men selv nå i ettertid hadde jeg foretrukket narkose selv om jeg vet det kan være skadelig for både mor og barn.

Mens jeg gikk gravid, så hadde jeg gallesteins-anfall. Det begynte egentlig lenge før jeg ble gravid, men det ble mye værre mens jeg var gravid. Det var en periode jeg tenkte at denne ungen ville bli født med abstinenser, for jeg har sterke smertestillende med opiater og jeg tok de flere ganger i uken på det værste. Jeg trodde ikke det var mulig at anfallene skulle bli værre etter graviditeten, men det har det. Jeg havnet på legevakten bare denne uken, jeg hadde så sterke smerter at jeg var ikke i stand til å gå en liten periode. Når jeg kom til legevakten, så nektet de meg å ta mer smertestillende. Jeg hadde visst tatt en liten overdose. Når de endelig slo inn, så hadde de rett. Jeg var kvalm og dårlig i et døgn etterpå. Hva er det med meg og ekstreme smerter? Virker som jeg tiltrekker meg det.

Jeg ble henvist til operasjon for å fjerne galleblæren mens jeg var gravid. For bare noen dager siden ringte jeg tilslutt sykehuset for å bli prioritert. Jeg fikk operasjonsdatoen i telefonen – 30. november.  Denne gangen er jeg bare hoppende glad for å bli operert. Det vil være værre å leve med gallesteinen enn å bli operert. Og jeg vil i det minste være i narkose denne gangen. Da har det ingen betydning hva som skjer med kroppen min. To operasjoner på litt over to måneder.

Plutselig går tiden for sakte.

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Kolikk Del 2

“Nyt spedbarnstiden” har jeg hørt fra flere personer, og jeg har virkelig lurt på hva de snakker om. Når de smiler rundt 5 uker gammel og etterhvert ler littegranne, så er ungen den skjønneste i verden – men det utgjør jo bare 5 minutter av 24 timer i døgnet. Resten av døgnet består av såvidt litt søvn, skriking, mating, skriking, bleieskiftarbeider, skriking, skriking, skriking…. også mat, skriking etc. Når man i tillegg har en unge som holder det gående fra 7/8 om morgenen til 22 om kvelden, uten å sove på dagtid, så er man fullstendig utslitt, ødelagt, desperat etc.

Jeg lærte etterhvert at det gjelder å holde kjeft om hvordan desperasjonen oste ut av meg (selv om jeg glemmer det like fort også), for selv foreldre som har barn forstår ikke hvor desperat og ødelagt man blir når man har en unge med kolikk. Setninger som begynner med eller man kan putte “det er jo bare ….” foran viste meg hvor uvitende de faktisk var.

Det varer jo bare i tre måneder. De kunne lik så godt sagt tre år. Det hjelper ikke å høre det når man sitter og surfer på pakketurer til Thailand og er bare dager unna å pakke kofferten og stikke. Noen ganger så lever man ikke fra dag til dag, men time for time.

Det er jo bare å gi opp… melk, løk, kål… ja, egentlig slutt å spis og bare produser brystmelk. På to uker etter jeg kom hjem fra sykehuset mistet jeg åtte kilo fordi imellom fullpumping og kolikkunge så er det svært vanskelig å ta vare på seg selv og tenke mat, ikke minst hva slags mat. Men nå skal det sies jeg prøvde, det var faktisk det som gjorde at jeg tilslutt fikk mistanke om melkeallergi.

Kanskje du skal snakke med helsesøstra om depresjon. Denne fikk jeg høre fra flere, og den er nedlatende selv om de som sier det gjør det med de beste hensikter. Prøv å eksistere flere uker uten søvn, ha en unge som hylskriker dag inn og dag ut, være nødt til å gå med ungen og ha han tett inntil seg hele dagen fordi han sover ikke etc. og se hvordan humøret ditt blir. Nei, det er ikke depresjon, det er rett og slett en tøff og krevende situasjon.

De gangene jeg har klart å bevege meg ut av huset (for hvem vil vel egentlig ta med en kolikkunge ut?), så jeg misunnelig på mødrene som satt på cafe med unger som sov eller hadde ungen rolig i fanget. Følte de seg like desperat som meg? Går de like mye i en tåke pga søvnmangel eller går langs gata og prøver å holde tårene vekk samtidig som ungen hylskriker i vogna? Men jeg var jo en av de som akkurat der og da hadde klart å lure meg ut – som oftest pga av en avtale hos helsestasjon eller tur på apoteket e.l.

Men nå som Simon er 9 uker, så har vi fått kontroll på kolikken. Han er fortsatt mye grinete og er veldig tydelig når han vil noe, men nå tror jeg at det er innenfor vanlige former. Vi prøvde disse tingene:

Minifom – Fantastisk! Da vi begynte med dette fikk vi en ny unge. Det fjerner luft ifra magen til ungen. Minifom’en tok vekk hylskrikingen, og etter dette trodde vi at Simon gråt like mye som “vanlige” barn, men det viste seg å ikke stemme.

Althera – morsmelkerstatning for babyer med melkeallergi. Dette var gjennombrudd nr. to. Fra første flaske vi gav han, så sov han fra kl. halv tre på ettermiddagen til syv neste morgen (bare avbrutt av at han spiste mat med øynene lukket). Dagen etterpå så var utslettet hans borte, og huden var nydelig. 40% av alle babyer med kolikk har melkeallergi. Etterpå har han blitt mye roligere og man kan legge han ned på et teppe e.l. i 10 minutter uten at han begynner å gråte, han har soveperioder på dagtid, sover roligere om natten. Det er en annen hverdag som er enklere å håndtere. Jeg kommer nok til å skrive et eget innlegg om nettopp melkeallergi etterhvert.

Dr. Brown flasker – gjelder flaskebarn. I motsetning til Avent-flaskene som påstår skal hjelpe mot kolikk og lyver deg rett i ansiktet, så funker faktisk Dr. Brown. Ungen får i seg lite luft ved mating, og gir klare rap etter mating og man trenger ikke å vente i en halvtime på rapen. Fås kjøpt på apoteket og i baby butikker.

Sukkervann – dette hjalp oss *kun* når det var 2 spiseskjeer med sukker i 1 dl vann, og gis eksakt når  ungen hylskriker. Ikke hvis det er gråting.

Amme-/fenikkelte – gi ungen 5 ml. med dette til hver måltid. Dette hjalp, men jeg var ikke flink nok til å gi dette ved hvert måltid. Jeg foretrekker fortsatt minifom.

Manuellterapeut – Dette blir brukt ved KISS/KIDD og man får gjerne høre manuellterapeut og kiropraktor om hverandre ved kolikk. Manuellterapeut er gratis, mens ved kiropraktor ruller kronene og jeg vet ikke om det er noe forskjell i hva de to gjør. Vi prøvde manuellterapeut, og det gjorde at Simon beveget hode mer begge veier. Han foretrakk å sove på en side med hodet, og hadde allerede begynt å få litt avflatet hode pga det. Simon var veldig stiv i kroppen, så når vi ikke merket så stor forskjell etter time nr. en så fikk vi komme inn til en time til. Da var Simon fin og avslappet i kroppen (da hadde vi begynt med morsmelkerstatning mot melkeallergi), og manuellterapeuten så ikke noe grunn til at vi skulle komme igjen. Utover mer bevegelighet i hodet, så har vi ikke merket noe forskjell.

 

Jeg leste på nettsider at det var vanlig at nyfødte sov mellom 10,5 – 20 timer i døgnet, og Simon sov ikke en gang 10,5 timer når det sto på som værst.  Nå sover han mere, men jeg lurer fortsatt på hva som er “normalt” hele tiden. Og jeg klarer enda ikke for mitt gode liv å forstå at folk velger å få en unge, for ikke å snakke om flere.

Men – dette innlegget ble faktisk skrevet på cafe, mens Simon lå ved siden av. Kun avbrutt av “inn med tutt” x antall ganger mens han sov, og en mating. Det er eksemplarisk! Victory! Ja, det høres bare så bedre ut på engelsk, enn ordet “seier” på norsk. Har ikke helt den samme scwhuungen.

 

Posted in Health & Wellbeing, Norsk | Tagged , | 2 Comments

Simon

20111105-203344.jpgMommy is at the cinema, so I can just stick out my tongue at daddy when he tries feeding me.

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French Fries Paprika

French Fries paprika har forsvunnet fra butikkene, og er bare tilgjengelig på utvalgte steder.

La oss slå et slag for de viktige tingene: REDD FRENCH FRIES PAPRIKA !! 😀

20111105-172600.jpg

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Når vold og seksualitet får fritt leide

Overalt hvor en er, så  bugner det av seksualisert reklame og nyheter. Hvor mange ganger har man vel ikke hørt “Vi advarer om sterke scener i denne repotasjen” når man ser nyhetene, hvor resultatene av krig og vold kommer frem. Nå er seksualitet og vold to forskjellige temaer med forskjellige vinkler, men jeg har lenge undret meg over hvor desensitiv vi har blitt ovenfor vold og sex i filmer, reklamer, nyheter – i samfunnet generelt. Jeg ble derfor glad over at jeg endelig så et innlegg i Aftenposten hvor dette ble tatt opp på en god måte.

For hvor “tolerante” skal vi bli? Er det virkelig i orden at nakenhet som fremstilles seksuelt skal være hverdagskost? Her er artiklene på forsiden av dagbladet.no som inneholder seksualitet/sex som tema idag (fredag 04. november):

Sexverktøyet alle par trenger

Handler om en god, gammel Oslo-orgie

– Det var ikke meninga å være nær puppen din

Pangstart for «Jomfru i nød»

Vi kommer til å fryse puppene av oss

Fan hevder mindreårig Justin Bieber gjorde henne gravid

 

Jeg har ikke tatt med artiklene som er knyttet til voldtektene i oslo. Det vil si hele 6 artikler på forsiden som omhandler sex. Er det noe rart jeg skummer gjennom artiklene på forsiden og ikke finner en eneste artikkel jeg har lyst til å lese?

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A self-proclaimed tea-nazi

Or for the love of tea!

I’m a self-proclaimed tea-nazi. I have measured temperature to brew  the tea in. I always brew the tea for the correct amount of minutes to ensure that the tea doesn’t become bitter. More importantly, I appreciate quality (black) tea which is hard to find here in Norway. Wikipedia has a table displaying what one needs to know about brewing tea:

Type Water Temp. Steep Time Infusions
White Tea 65 to 70 °C (149 to 158 °F) 1–2 minutes 3
Yellow Tea 70 to 75 °C (158 to 167 °F) 1–2 minutes 3
Green Tea 75 to 80 °C (167 to 176 °F) 1–2 minutes 4-6
Oolong Tea 80 to 85 °C (176 to 185 °F) 2–3 minutes 4-6
Black Tea 99 °C (210 °F) 2–3 minutes 2-3
Pu’er Tea 95 to 100 °C (203 to 212 °F) Limitless Several
Herbal Tea 99 °C (210 °F) 3–6 minutes Varied

In Aftenposten there is an article in Norwegian about teahouses in Oslo, and it makes me miss Oslo even more. There’s no place in Stavanger that I know of who focus on tea. We have Kaffehuset who sells tea and coffee, but the service staff don’t have much knowledge about tea and the quality of the black tea is the same as most places in Norway, terrible. I wish I could brag about my knowledge of where one can buy quality tea’s, but the best place so far has been Fortnum & Mason  that Merete introduced me too. I can really recommend Earl Grey Classic Tea which is the best Earl Grey I’ve tasted. My next order I will also purchase black tea with lemon. I tried black tea with apple, as well as mango, but it wasn’t anything for me. The problem with Fortum & Mason is that the postage is really expensive, so it’s only something I will do once a year (and even pay the extra customs getting it into the country). As a side note, they have the best customer service I have ever experienced – Exemplary!

Tea is one of the things I have been a bit obsessed with. When I was in New York I took a trip to TeaNy which served a beautiful, velvety Earl Grey Creme. I purchased the same tea from (well, same name and “content”) from Teavana, but it didn’t have the same velvety taste as at TeaNy. I will not order from them again, but there are several other places that serves the same tea. I guess I will have to try them out at some point.

In the image above is my tea accessories. A tin with Earl Grey Classic tea from Fortnum and Mason, a spoon with the engraving “1 cup of perfect tea” and two timers – one for black tea and one for fruit tea which are the only teas I like. And the “trey” is perfect for putting some sugar cubes on and After Eight Mints which I don’t have at home right now.

I also have two different tea boxes which caters for tea bags of different sizes. Love those boxes, they are beautiful and classic.

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Today

I’m going to get a massage…. or going to a whore house. I’m not quite sure which. What am I to think about a place where they speak Norwegian very poorly and are open to 10pm?

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Amming og likestilling

Photo by: http://www.flickr.com/photos/xmangel/. License: CC BY-NC-SA 2.0

Hva har amming med likestilling å gjøre? Det er spørsmålet jeg stiller meg når jeg følger med på ammedebatten Lysbakken startet. Det virker som at den gjengse oppfatning av likestilling er å få kvinner fortest tilbake i jobb, hvor amming dermed stopper kvinnen i å løpe tilbake til jobb. Med andre ord, etter at kvinnen har gått gravid i ni måneder  med halsbrann, kvalme, utslitthet, vondt for å gå, ryggplager (som igjen gir lite/dårlig søvn) etc., så gjør kvinnen den hælvetes smertefulle jobben å føde barnet. Deretter følges det seks uker, også kalt barselstiden hvor kroppen og hormonene går vill for å starte ammingen og kroppen omstiller seg etter å ha gått gravid. Og midt oppi dette så har kvinnen et barn som krever mat svært ofte, mye gråt, lite søvn etc. Rent fysisk går kvinner igjennom så mye når det gjelder å bære frem et barn at mannfolkene burde tilbe grunnen kvinnen går på.

Men i den moderne tiden vi lever i, så er ikke det godt nok. De fysiske strabasene vi kvinner går igjennom er ikke et sidenotat engang, for her skal kjønnene likestilles så mye at det gjelder å få kvinnen tilbake til jobb fortest mulig. Det er jo likestilling, må de vite.

Vet du hva som er likestilling for meg?

Muligheten for at familien selv kan velge hvordan de ønsker å tilrettelegge tiden etter fødsel, amming eller ei.
At ikke kun menn ansatt i det offentlige får to ukers fødselspermisjon. Kvinnen trenger virkelig all hjelp hun kan få i denne tiden, men det er kanskje ikke noe man likestilles?
At fars rett til foreldrepenger ikke er avhengig av at mor er i arbeid.

Likestilling for meg er retten til å velge slik det passer meg  og min familie uten at staten legger føringer slik de mener vi burde velge.

Amming som tema har punkter som trenger å revurderes. Å fullamme til barnet er seks måneder har ikke hold i Norge/vestlige land, forskning viser at det ikke er flere helsemessige fordeler ved fullamming etter fire måneder . Det er ikke noe informasjon som gis om alternativer til amming som morsmelkerstatning (MME), fullpumping etc. fra sykehuset selv om man ikke får til ammingen. Min erfaring med sykehuset er at jordmødrene er for travle og har for mange personer til en gang ha et fokus på forskjellige amme-strategier å prøve ut når ammingen ikke fungerer. Men at de kun har fokus på amming og at det er et ammepress – ingen tvil.

Amming har ingenting med likestilling å gjøre. Det burde ikke være ønskelig å gjøre kjønnene mest mulig like, og amming er en av de fysiske forskjellene mellom kvinner og menn. Uansett hvor mye likestilling som eksisterer så visker det ikke ut fysiske forskjeller. Barn har behov for brystmelk/MME, og i de tilfeller hvor det ikke går så burde det være opp til familien å bestemme hvordan å håndtere dette, jobb eller ikke.

Tvert imot viser statistikk at seks av ti kvinner foretrekker å være hjemme med barna. Og siden 70-tallet når kvinnene for alvor kom inn i arbeidsmarkedet, så har kvinners lykke bare gått nedover. At kvinner er nå en naturlig del av arbeidsmarkedet er positivt, men karriere/jobb blir nå brukt som en slegge i likestillingens navn hvor kvinner skal i jobb og det er uglesett å ha andre ønsker enn å jobbe. At kvinner vil la seg forsørge av en mann blir ansett for å være et nederlag og et slag mot likestillingen. Eller som det i denne fine artikkelen synser om: Å bli forsørget gjør oss til kjedelige samtalepartnere og leder til skilsmisse. Man trenger ikke mye sunn fornuft for å skjønne at det argumentet faller sammen på egen hånd. Kvinner har aldri jobbet så mye eller vært mer mindre lykkelig. Men vi er i det minste skikkelig likestilt, må de vite!

Når skal vi innse at det er forskjell mellom kjønnene og i vår natur/ønsker. Likestilling = like rettigheter. Likestilling er ikke ensbetydende med karriere for mor.  Likestilling for meg er også at vi vedkjenner oss forskjellene mellom kjønnene. Det er flott at kvinner kan jobbe, men det betyr ikke at kvinner ønsker å prioritere jobb fremfor familie eller amming for den saks skyld. Kanskje vi burde ta over oss at kvinner var lykkeligere når de var hjemmeværende? Det betyr ikke at vi skal gå tilbake til slik det var, men at det er et varsko om å ikke dra likestillingen for langt.

Og apropos likestilling: Hvorfor skal det koste kvinner tre ganger mer å sterilisere seg?

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Amming, nok et propaganda tema

Aftenposten har en artikkel idag om at Lysbakken har gått ut og sagt at amming kan tilpasses familiesituasjonen og kommer med alternative forslag til fullamming frem til babyen er seks måneder.

Det er så ufattelig mye propaganda knyttet til det å få barn og bli mor/far, at dette er bare nok et tema som er så gjennomsyret av følelser. Beste sitat fra artikkelen:

Alle de som har nyfødte barn vet hvor mye følelser det ligger i ammesituasjonen.

Som nybakt mor med en unge som er fem uker, la meg komme med en kommentar:

Nei, det trenger ikke å være noe som helst følelser knyttet til ammesituasjonen utover frustrasjon, smerte, fortvilelse (fordi det ikke funker) og et ønske om at ungen skal ha mat og en sunn vektøkning. Det som ligger implisitt i sitatet ovenfor er at amming skal være en positiv opplevelse som gir nærhet, men alt man trenger å gjøre er å ta et enkelt google søk på brystspreng, for lite brystmelk, såre nippler, sugeteknikk, morsmelkerstatning etc. så ser man at amming faktisk ikke trenger å være en positiv opplevelse. Det beste argumentet for amming er at barnet mottar de samme antistoffene mot sykdom som moren har med brystmelk. Utover det så kan amming kan være en utelukkende negativ opplevelse, og innspillet fra Lysbakken er et sunt og nødvendig innspill. Tvert imot tror jeg svært mange kvinner (99%) opplever problemer knyttet til amming på et eller annet tidspunkt.

Nå blir hele saken koblet opp mot likestilling, et tema jeg ikke vil gå inn på her men som jeg har mange meninger om. Men det som provoserer meg mest er all propagandaen som blir spydd ut om hvor fantastisk det skal være å bli forelder og ikke minst hvor bra amming skal være. Værstingene på propagandaen er kvinner og mødrene selv, og jeg blir glad de få gangene jeg faktisk kommer over materiell som fokuserer mest på kunnskap og ikke rundt situasjonen man er i (og rosemaler det).

Hvordan du ammer ditt barn” utgitt av Helsedirektoratet er et bra hefte man kan laste ned om amming som fokuserer på kunnskap, men man trenger ikke å lete lenge for å finne rosemalingen  rundt det å bli foreldre og situasjonen der og. Det er informasjon i dette heftet som Lysbakken snakker om.

Takk Lysebakken for at du tar opp et tema som trenger revurdering. Du kommer til å møte motstand.

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Kolikk

Jeg leser alt jeg kommer over om kolikk, og jeg blir bare mer og mer provosert. Veldig mange råd er knyttet til å etterlikne hvordan barnet hadde det i magen, samt sette på repetetiv “støy” som støvsuger etc.

Et veldig godt eksempel på disse elendige rådene: Ny teknikk mot kolikk

Ungen har det vondt i magen, og rådene som gis er å pakke ungen inn og lage suselyder??? Om en voksen har sterke magesmerter hver dag i tre måneder, så gir man ikke den voksne anbefalingen å høre på favorittmusikken sin hver dag i tre måneder og bruke en varmeflaske.

Og ikke nok med det, kolikk kommer når ungen er mellom 2 – 4 uker gammel. Måten å diagnosere dette er følgende:

Periodevis skriking hos et spedbarn (under 3 måneder gammel) mer enn 3 timer per dag, oftere enn tre dager per uke i mer enn tre uker
Kilde: http://www.helsedoktoren.no/pc-240-39-Kolikk.aspx

Ungen er allerede nesten en måned når man blir mer og mer sikker, men neida. Dette skal pågå i mer enn tre uker før man er sikker på at ungen har kolikk. Ungen er allerede da 2 måneder gammel før diagnosen er klar, og kolikk skal gå over når ungen er 3 måneder.

For noe fullstendig bullshit! Ungen er praktisk talt ferdig med kolikk perioden når man har fått diagnosen.

Hvorfor ikke innrømme det åpenbare? Legestanden er fullstendig uvitende når det gjelder kolikk, og problemer med spedbarn er for uinteressant til at de ønsker å finne en løsning på det. Neida, la ungene bare ha smerter i tre måneder, det er løsningen til legestanden.

Idioti !

…. og i mellomtiden gråter foreldrene nesten like mye som ungen… Og moren avstår fra alt mulig av matvarer i håp om at det hjelper. Så nå avstår jeg fra brus, kaffe, svart te, sjokolade også skal jeg begynne å holde meg unna alt av melkeprodukter.

Posted in Health, Norsk | 1 Comment

In Waiting

If your soul wants to dance, staying in bed is stressfull, and dancing is restful.

It’s only 8 days until my due date and I’m in waiting. I was in bad shape for a while and was unable to do much, but now I’m in good shape again and can function almost normally (I’m so happy that my boyfriend cooks me dinner and sometimes breakfast). I’m no longer counting the days by monday, tuesday etc. Instead it’s 10, 9, 8 days until my due date. The days are starting to move slower, I’m more bored and don’t know what to make the days go by. It’s boring!

I have looked for TV series, but there doesn’t seem to be many of them that interest me. I just finished reviewing Dark Angel for the n’th time which is a very good series. I have seen Supernatural for the third time, I’m not motivated to view Angel. Buffy, Firefly, Tru Calling, Dollhouse again. You have probably caught the drift on what kind of TV series I like by now. And those are the good series, there are loads of crappy ones.

And then there’s books and I have already mentioned that I’m not very motivated there either.

I have one project I would like to do – create a multiple purse holder, but I’m not so much of an arts & crafts gal or I would have been all over this by now.

I could start looking more seriously for tv series and books to read, I could cook food and keep in the freezer since I will need it when the baby is out.

The problem is that I’m bored of my own company. Being with myself every day gets pretty demotivational. Staying at home makes me mental, so I go out every day now to be less mental. I want to go to the cinema, but the films I want to see only goes in the evening. It was easier when I lived in oslo, the films was always available in the daytime and a lot cheaper. When I wasn’t working, I took a walk in the morning, went to the cinema and cafe in the afternoon, met friends, exercised and somehow the days flew by and I was happy.

Awaiting a baby elephant kind of stops me from moving around as much. I can’t wait until I can piss straight again and get rid of the back pains. And drink black tea again (black tea gives awful heartburns).

Things are in order now, all the baby things etc. are there. There’s nothing more I need to get done.

I’m so uninspired. Now, where’s the chocolate?

Posted in Miscellaneous, English | 5 Comments

Piracy – when there is no other option

I purchase ebooks because they are easily available and easy to get rid of the DRM. When it comes to movies and TV series, things isn’t that easily available. On the Norwegian iTunes store there is no films or TV series that can be purchased. There is no access to Hulu or Netflix (unless one fake it until one makes it).

So what is the easiest, available option – piracy, of course! It’s not legal and I prefer to pay for whatever content I use. The reason I want to pay for it is easy: If I throw money at the things I like, it means that more content of what I like will be made available to me. Another reason is that I like to do things legally as well, but who cares about that desire except me?

So when I read a statement by Jon Favreau about original films weren’t made anymore because the limits upon earnings had become very strict, I couldn’t help but think:

Please Hollywood! Make it easy for me to purchase your films and TV Series (and without DRM), and you will get money from me.

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Uplifting, joyous books

Photo by: http://www.flickr.com/photos/mtsofan/ License: CC BY-NC-SA 2.0

I read a lot when I was young, biographies, fiction, you name it. I even read “Lord of the Rings” two or three times. I have tried to read the books several times again, but now I’m unable to read the first 50 pages without loosing interest. I don’t know when it happened, but somewhere along I got hooked into fantasy books, and I stayed there. When I was 30 I was going through a rough patch and then I got hooked into personal growth books which helped me tremendously to improve my mental well-being.

Now I’m 33, going on 34, and I am stuck on fantasy, science fiction and personal growth books. I used to enjoy reading Wilbur Smith and the Courtney books when I was a teenager, so last week I decided to give it another try. See if it would rekindle the flame. I managed to read 20 pages during a week. That’s bad, that isn’t rekindling anything. The setting is in Africa where the boy “Sean” lives on his family farm. It starts off with a hunting episode, and already there the book lost me. Books with hunting in them when I’m a vegetarian, let’s just say it’s not my area of interest.

Before going on this failed quest, I read all the seven books in the Harry Potter series. I used to love those books, I was enthralled into another world and when I stopped reading them I woke up to the real and more boring world where magic didn’t exist. Now I got the feeling that the books really were written for teenagers/children, and I was annoyed multiple times by the bad characters in the books. The Dursley’s which are mean and narrow, the always slick and unsympathetic Snape, the brat Draco and his thugs. I don’t like characters that are so easily labeled, that have no sympathetic character traits that I like. I like people that may be evil, but still have some human features that makes me recognize them as being human and possibly likable to a small degree. At least give me one bad person with a good sense of humor. Or a bad person who can be a bit fickle, and sometimes show mercy at unpredictable times.

No, life and people instead are in many regards portrayed as either good or evil, black and white, Jedi or Sith. And the interesting thing is, evil always seems to have stronger powers than goodness, but since goodness persists it wins. I’m getting tired of this and since this is mostly the themes of fantasy books as well, only with magic into the mix, I’ve lost interest in reading.

I want to read uplifting, joyous books. There may be some bad circumstances, but they are not to be dwelled upon and are more of a side note in the story. I don’t need a lot of misery to get to a happy ending that are only in the 30 last pages of the book. I loved Eat Pray Love because it started off with a divorce, but it was only a side note in the book. The reason why I still read personal growth books is because of their interesting stories of clients that have overcome obstacles and how they did it, and there are some good advice there as well usually. I keep track of Oprah because I find uplifting things there.

I want to stop reading news because it only focus on the bad things, and I don’t need that disturbance in my life. I only want stories and people that adds something to my life.

So I’m out of ideas on what to read. There are only so much personal growth books can give me, and I’ve lost interest. Do you have any suggestions?

Posted in EBooks, English, Inspiration & reviews | 1 Comment

Upgrade

Photo by: http://www.flickr.com/people/strawbleu/ License: CC BY-NC-SA 2.0

I’d love to make over….

my time in the kitchen. I love eating good and healthy, but I don’t have the time, surplus and may be motivation(?!.) to create good food. Eating good food makes me feel good, healthy and create the surplus I want. I just don’t get to that place. It’s a bad circle I don’t seem to come out of.

I’d never change….

the moment that inspired this blog post. I was sitting outside in the sun with a cold coca cola, reading O Magazine, and I found these two questions that made me think what my answers were.That moment of inspiration is what makes me feel alive and gives sparks of joy.Furthermore, that’s when I found out I can sit outside in the blazing sun with my Macbook Air and I see the screen perfectly.

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The aftermath of the oslo terrorism

Photo by: http://www.flickr.com/photos/cicilie/. License: CC BY-NC-SA 2.0

On 22nd July Oslo was hit by terrorism, first a bomb went of in the government quarter and then the massacre at Utøya. 77 people was killed and during the last week there have been funerals all over Norway. During the first week Norwegians were glued to the newspapers and TV, soaking up every detail of the incident. Trying to make sense of it, trying to understand what we couldn’t imagine anybody doing.

I remember exactly where I was and what I was doing when I first heard of 7/11-2001, and the same is true of 22/07-2011. I will not forget those moments.When the Norwegians first heard of the terror attack the initial response was to gather information, figure out what was happening. In the back of everybody’s minds were the thought that we had been hit by Muslim fundamentalists, but both people, the government and the media were expecting more information before drawing any conclusions. The media was more concerned with gathering information of what was happening. Of course there were some reports of Norwegians chasing Muslims down the streets, but an overwhelming degree of people didn’t. There will always be somebody who behaves badly towards innocent people after such incidences, but it doesn’t represent the general public and we shouldn’t treat such incidences as if they do represent the majority of people. The next day we were told it was a Norwegian who was behind the terror.

The police, hospitals, health staff, fire brigade etc. responded quickly and dealt with the situation effectively and professionally.

Our response was to maintain our society, and not rush into more security, more surveillance, passing laws that restrict the general public etc. A commission has been formed to get an overview of Anders Behring Breivik (ABB) activities the last ten years, and come up with recommendations.

There has been debate on what degree we should allow extremist opinions in the public debates and especially on the internet, and it has been a good debate. We are also seeing the beginning of a “new” discussion – immigration and attitudes towards Muslims. Some believes that the response would have been different if the perpetrators had been Muslims and there is  truth to that statement and that we only can “afford” a response of openness and love because the offender was Norwegian. I think Norwegians would still behave in the same way, but there would be a lot more outbursts of hate etc. towards Muslims. Here’s the thing: It’s possible to do two things at once: React with love and hate/fear at the same time. One reaction doesn’t reflect badly upon the other.

Let me come with an example. I’m a vegetarian which means I hear a lot of comments from meat lovers. Many years ago I was at a funeral, and afterwards I attended the memorial service afterwards. They only served sandwiches with meat, so I declined. The sister of the deceased heard me decline the sandwich, and started yelling at me very loudly for being disrespectful.  I don’t agree with her reaction, but I don’t let that incident color my view of other people or the society as a whole. Her or the many other bad reactions I have received doesn’t reflect on those who meet me with an open mind and acceptance. Most people accept my decision, they have just made a different decision from mine.

Norway responded perfectly to this tragedy, and I couldn’t be more proud of what it means to be Norwegian. The very best qualities of the “Norwegian personality” really shined through. I love Norway and the people here, it’s such a beautiful nation.

And we need to have a debate on immigration and attitudes towards Muslims and their impact on Norway, hopefully using valid references, numbers and statistics. We can have it both ways and they don’t reflect badly upon each other no matter how hard the words will be.

 

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Waiting for christmas

I’ve developed a new habit when I get to work. Within 30 minutes of my arrival at work, I check komplett.no to see if there has been any change in the release date of Samsung Galaxy Tab 10.1. Then I google for news about the tablet to see if there is some new information out there. I wrote a mail to the nordic division of Samsung, and it seems like a 32Gb version of the tablet will not be available, but a 64Gb version will be released during autumn. Unfortunately, they didn’t have a release date for it.

I’m so looking forward to this tablet, and waiting for the 64Gb version seems unending. It’s annoying, especially since I want to have it before the birth, but that doesn’t seem likely right now. There are other tablets out there with support for extra card readers, usb etc. but the cost of this is heavier and thicker tablets. I want a tablet that take little space in my bag and isn’t heavy, so I still end up with Samsung Galaxy Tab 10.1. There are many rumors about a kindle tablet, so if Samsung is too late, then may be a kindle tablet  is the way to go instead.

And while I’m waiting for the Tab, I’m also waiting for Kindle DX 4. During summer time, reading books outside on e-ink is a joy and therefore I have to have a kindle as well. But I don’t want to purchase a kindle before the new edition arrives. There are rumors that it might contain colors which I would love to see in an e-ink gadget. A new release of Kindle DX should be in about a year.

Why do I have to be such a gadget geek that I *have* to wait for the new, shiniest toy. Second best just isn’t good enough.

And while we are on the subject,I need to purchase a new digital camera and so far the recommendation has been Canon PowerShot SX 230 HS and Canon PowerShot S95. Anybody else have thoughts on this? I may be a gadget geek, but photo geek I’m not.

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